Transparent & Deep

Lord, I long to be transparent but deep...

I think of a calm lake, knowing that many times I can look in and see the life teeming on the shallower parts. But sometimes I have to actually get in to experience the rest that my eyes cannot behold just from simply looking. I want to be like that. Exposed and approachable, but also so deeply rooted that looking in the water only gives you a small glimpse of the work that is going on much deeper. God, draw people to your living water that you have deeply rooted in my soul!

Beautiful Brokenness

God has given us a beautiful brokenness in the light of the Gospel. This weekend as I looked into the broken eyes of young women, my heart was overwhelmed. Who told them they weren’t lovely? Who whispered that they simply weren’t enough?

But why were they still so lovely in the midst of this? What gave dead eyes such gentle hope?

As the women of FSU cried out in surrender this weekend, they were met with a Mighty Warrior. I saw strength being restored.

But these women weren’t met with self-help books or pep talks; they were met with a provision far greater. They were given an inheritance. They were given beauty from ashes. And their hearts were bound and sealed with perfect righteousness; righteousness through the lamb who was slain. 

Places long devastated were rebuilt and shame was diminished by everlasting joy.

Stop holding out empty cups to the world, stop pleading with things of this earth to fill you! Sit at the feet of Jesus and in faith believe that you have been forgiven.

Let the words of Isaiah 61 say what my fumbling words are trying to:

“The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me,
    because the Lord has anointed me
    to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
    to proclaim freedom for the captives
    and release from darkness for the prisoners,^[a]
2 to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor
    and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,
³     and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
    instead of ashes,
the oil of joy
    instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
    instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
    a planting of the Lord
    for the display of his splendor.

⁴ They will rebuild the ancient ruins
    and restore the places long devastated;
they will renew the ruined cities
    that have been devastated for generations.
⁵ Strangers will shepherd your flocks;
    foreigners will work your fields and vineyards.
⁶ And you will be called priests of the Lord,
    you will be named ministers of our God.
You will feed on the wealth of nations,
    and in their riches you will boast.

⁷ Instead of your shame
    you will receive a double portion,
and instead of disgrace
    you will rejoice in your inheritance.
And so you will inherit a double portion in your land,
    and everlasting joy will be yours.

⁸ “For I, the Lord, love justice;
    I hate robbery and wrongdoing.
In my faithfulness I will reward my people
    and make an everlasting covenant with them.
⁹ Their descendants will be known among the nations
    and their offspring among the peoples.
All who see them will acknowledge
    that they are a people the Lord has blessed.”

¹⁰ I delight greatly in the Lord;
    my soul rejoices in my God.
For he has clothed me with garments of salvation
    and arrayed me in a robe of his righteousness,
as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest,
    and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels.
¹¹ For as the soil makes the sprout come up
    and a garden causes seeds to grow,
so the Sovereign Lord will make righteousness
    and praise spring up before all nations.”

Life hurts

I think it’s safe to say that life hurts.

Tonight as I reflected on my day and desired to choose joy, I smacked my knee into my dresser. I sat there a moment as the stinging pain pulsed through my knee and finally subsided. As I lay there, feeling the still fresh pain, all I could think was one day this won’t happen anymore. Then I laughed. You see, I’m starting to catch on to Satan’s tricks these days. When we feel like we’re doing a good job of running the race, Satan uses sin and disappointments to trip us, leaving us in pain and feeling somewhat helpless.

I knew that the tempting anger was not truth as I recalled the thought I was having right as I hit my knee.  God had given me peace in the strangest of circumstances. I was thinking of everything that had not gone according to my own plans, and thanking God that He loves me enough to discipline me. Peace and joy flowed through my thoughts and I dwelt on the words “Christ alone.” … Christ alone is enough reason for joy, Christ alone produces peace, Christ alone is who I can put my hope in, Christ alone makes me whole…. Christ alone. No wonder my thoughts were interrupted by temptation and pain. Satan can’t stand the truth!

Sometimes it seems like God’s voice is hard to hear and other times it can ring clear as day. Sometimes we feel like we’re searching in the dark and other times a sting can awaken us and help us to pay attention. The slight physical pain reminded me of my human state. I’m still living in the flesh and there is earthly pain and discomfort that comes with that –disappointment, unmet expectations, and yes even physical aches. But thank God that there will be a day when we no longer feel pain and we won’t hurt anymore. I can lift my eyes and know that these afflictions truly are light and momentary, and there will be an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 

"Great peace have those who love your law; nothing can make them stumble."

Psalm 119:165